Crack in The Window

I have spent the last 48 hours or so (not including bathroom breaks and 6 hour cat naps) trying to accomplish a technological feat. I want to send an email. Well, not just any email. I want to send an informational email that looks like all the cool junk emails I never read.

I began the quest several days ago and tried several different applications. A woman far wiser than I suggested I try Publisher, and after building an entire newsletter that wouldn’t translate beyond an attachment to an email, I discovered the Email Template in Publisher, and rejoiced!! Wonder of wonders, this stinking thing was designed to format an email. What could be simpler, right? Yeah, right.

Why do the tormentors of Microsoft feel it’s necessary to change virtually everything in every new edition of their software, even when it is the exact same feature they have provided since day one? I have Publisher 2007, and I am trying to relearn everything I used to know in 2005; but I digress.

The issue at hand is that I have sent the completed email document to myself, more than 30 times, and each time one or more of the pictures, or attachments in the document does not appear. This, by the way seems random as different things appear and disappear.

I have come close to losing my mind as I read pages of tutorials all meant to make this little process a simple one. Some are from 2001, and so, not so helpful. Some helps are recent but it seems I must ask two or three questions first in order to arrive at the stage of help that I think I need right now.

In an age when so much in cyberspace really is idiotic proof, is it purposefully tough to use Microsoft’s applications? I will tell you that after this debacle I am convinced I need more fiber in my techno life, so I am going to try an Apple.